Why protecting your peace is more important than winning an argument Bill and I rarely fight. In fact, after nearly sixteen years of marriage, I can count on one hand the things that truly get under my skin. But there is one thing that can make me grip the armrest a little tighter… Bill's driving. Now before he reads this blog and starts defending himself, let me just say: he is an excellent driver. However, he also likes to drive a little closer to other cars than I would pr

Adding Color to Your Marriage When Bill and I wrote Pamper Your Marriage, we didn't just want couples to learn the pillars, we wanted them to live them. But here's something I've discovered after nearly fifteen years of marriage: Even healthy marriages need fresh paint from time to time. Not because they're broken. Not because they're failing. But because life has a way of making everything feel ordinary if we're not intentional. Walls fade. Furniture gets worn. And relations

Praise Pillar Focus - Sometimes Appreciation Grows in Absence This week I learned that my Superman's greatest superpower isn't what he does for our family, it's knowing where his strength comes from. Last week, Bill was out of town helping his family. Of course, I missed him. But what surprised me most wasn't how much I missed his companionship. It was how much I missed everything he does. You see, Bill is the primary "nanny" in our household. Living with my daughter and gran

Finding Joy Together Even in Seasons of Grief This past Sabbath, Bill and I found ourselves laughing, singing, and making silly faces at a dueling piano bar with our family. And honestly? It was healing. My daughter had arranged the evening for all of us as a way to celebrate my brother’s life together. What could have been only a night of sadness became something surprisingly beautiful - a night filled with stories, music, laughter, and connection. As I looked around the tab

Trusting God With the Seeds We Plant This past weekend, Bill and I had the opportunity to do a book signing at the John 3:16 Bookstore. And honestly? We were so excited just to be there. A couple days before the signing, we were also invited to share our story and ministry on the John 3:16 podcast. Sitting together and talking about marriage, faith, healing, and the heart behind Pamper Your Marriage reminded me why we wrote this book in the first place. Not to become famous.

When Marriage Requires Grace, Space, and Spiritual Strength Life has a way of becoming very full. Right now, Bill and I are living with my daughter and helping care for our grandchildren. It’s a beautiful season… but also a busy one. And if I’m being honest, I’ve noticed something lately. I’ve been intentionally pouring so much time into my daughter, our family, and everything around me… that sometimes I unintentionally neglect giving time to Bill. Not because I don’t love hi

When Serving Becomes a Language of Love The other night, Bill brought me a plate. Not just any plate… A beautifully arranged platter of fresh vegetables and fruit. Simple. Intentional. Thoughtful. And in that moment, I was reminded of something so powerful: Love isn’t just spoken… it’s served. Bill has always been someone who shows love through his actions. He doesn’t always say a lot…(And if I’m being honest, I wouldn’t mind hearing it a little more often 😉) But he lives it

When Your Marriage Becomes the Ground Where Vision Grows Recently, I created a vision board for Pamper Your Marriage as well as every area in our life. Not just a collage of dreams…But a declaration of what I believe God is building through our marriage. And if I’m being honest… I don’t fully see the path yet. But we are praying into it. There are moments in our walk with God where He shows us what… But not always how. I can clearly see: Strong, God-honoring marriages Couples

The Power of Building Each Other Up As Bill and I continue seeking God for the path to the mountaintop vision He’s placed in our hearts, we have realized something important… Even when the path isn’t clear, there is always something to praise. We don’t fully see where God is leading yet. We have seen glimpses. We have felt confirmation. We have taken steps. But the full picture? Not yet. And in this space, we have a choice: We can grow frustrated…Or we can grow grateful. So w

The Meditation Pillar in Marriage Last week, I shared how Bill and I discovered something powerful while reading Hebrews 4 that rest is the first step . It was exactly what we needed in that moment—to stop striving and trust God before trying to figure anything out. But what we didn’t realize at the time was… that was just the beginning. Bill and I have been talking a lot about the vision God has placed on our hearts. I can see it clearly. I can feel it. I believe it’s from G

This past Sabbath, Bill and I had one of those moments where you just know… God is speaking. Not loudly. Not dramatically. But clearly. A Mountaintop Vision… Without the Path Before our devotional time, we had been reading Crazy Faith by Michael Todd together. One line stood out to us: "God will either give you the path to the mountaintop…or the mountaintop view without the path." And that hit home. Because I’ve been carrying a vision. A mountaintop vision. I can see it. I c

Bill and I just had another beautiful Sabbath Together weekend , and I’m reminded again how powerful it is to simply… pause. No rushing. No pressure. Just presence. 💕 This weekend looked simple—resting, laughing, and yes… playing Qwirkle together (which got a little competitive 😄). But what may look ordinary on the outside was actually sacred on the inside. Because Sabbath isn’t just about stopping work…It’s about making space for connection . In our Pamper Your Marriage D

The Prayer Pillar in Marriage You may have noticed… I didn’t post last week. That wasn’t by accident. It was intentional. Sometimes the most important thing we can do for our marriage, our ministry, and our own hearts is to step back—not to produce, not to push forward—but simply to pray . And that’s what I did. This past week became a quiet reset. A time to slow down. To listen more than speak. To sit with the Lord instead of striving to write something meaningful. Because t

This week Bill and I are on vacation. It’s a simple pause before the upcoming Beauty Treatments Retreat—a moment to breathe, rest, and prepare our hearts for what the Lord is about to do in the lives of the women who will gather. But in the quiet of this week, I’ve found myself reflecting on something very personal. The man I married. Life moves quickly. Responsibilities grow. Families expand. Ministry opportunities increase. Schedules fill. And sometimes, if we’re not carefu

Encouraging Yourself in the Lord During a Fast There are seasons when the Lord gently calls us to draw closer to Him in ways that stretch us. For me, this season has been a fast as I prepare for an upcoming women's retreat. Fasting has a way of revealing where we normally go for comfort. When food is removed, the heart becomes more aware of its deeper hunger. And in that hunger, God meets us. But fasting doesn’t happen in isolation when you’re married. It becomes something yo

Guarding The Covenant There are seasons in marriage when the house is quiet. And there are seasons when the house is very, very full. Right now, we are living in the full season. Living with our daughter and grandchildren is a gift. It is laughter, noise, responsibility, movement, and shared life. It is meaningful and beautiful. But it is also layered. Because when a house is full, it takes intention to make sure the marriage doesn’t slowly become background noise. In a multi

Sometimes Sabbath doesn’t look like what we imagine. It isn’t always a planned day with energy, productivity, or perfectly curated moments. Sometimes Sabbath comes quietly — when you’re tired, not feeling well, and in need of rest more than anything else. That’s what this past getaway was for Bill and me. We were able to slip away overnight. We both weren’t feeling great physically, but instead of pushing through or filling the time with activity, we listened to our bodies an

There’s a romantic idea we sometimes hold onto—that love should always be spontaneous. That if it’s real, it will just happen . But real life tells a different story. Busy schedules. Full houses. Shared responsibilities. Emotional exhaustion. In seasons like these, love doesn’t always show up unannounced. Sometimes… love has to be scheduled . And that doesn’t make it less meaningful. It makes it intentional. This Valentine’s Day, Bill and I are getting away together. A hotel.

There is a quiet temptation that creeps in when we don’t name it: the temptation to look to our spouse to meet needs that only God can satisfy. If I were looking to my husband to meet all my emotional, physical, and spiritual needs in this season, I would surely be disappointed — not because he doesn’t love me, but because this season is full. Bill is pouring himself out for my daughter and our grandchildren. He is attentive, present, and serving faithfully. And while I am de

Lately, I’ve been slowly and thoughtfully reading Tim Keller’s book on prayer. And as I’ve been sitting with it, I’ve found myself thinking, “I wish I had read this before writing our chapter on meditation.” Not because what we wrote was wrong — but because biblical meditation is even richer and more relational than I first understood. Meditation, as Scripture teaches it, isn’t about emptying the mind. It’s about engaging the heart. And that understanding has quietly reshaped