SABBATH TOGETHER - Still Choosing Us

16 Years and Still Making Room to Rest Together

This past weekend, Bill and I celebrated 16 years of marriage, and honestly, our anniversary weekend wasn't extravagant. We didn't have a packed itinerary or a long list of things we wanted to accomplish. We went to our camper, stepped away from the normal demands of life, enjoyed the beautiful fall scenery, explored a little, and rested. It was peaceful, simple, and exactly what we needed.

As I thought about our weekend, I realized how much this season represents our Sabbath Together pillar of Pamper Your Marriage. Our last Sabbath post was about learning to simply be together, but this weekend reminded me of something else: after 16 years, we still have to intentionally choose us.

Marriage Needs Room to Breathe

Life gets crowded. There are children and grandchildren, work, ministry, appointments, responsibilities, finances, things around the house, and people we love who need us. All of those things are important, but if we're not careful, marriage can slowly become the relationship that receives whatever time and energy are left over. I don't want that for us.

There is something about getting away that helps me remember who we were before all the other roles were added. For a weekend, we can step away from being everything everyone else needs us to be and simply be Bill and Jodie - husband and wife.

We can talk without watching the clock. We can sit quietly without feeling like we should be accomplishing something. We can explore, laugh, rest, and enjoy one another. There is no pressure to make every moment special because simply having uninterrupted time together is special. After 16 years, I think I appreciate that more than ever.

Sixteen Years of Different Waters

I love this picture of us standing by the water because, in some ways, it reminds me of marriage itself. Sixteen years together has brought different seasons. Some have felt calm and peaceful, while others have moved a little faster than we expected. There have been beautiful moments, difficult moments, changes, adjustments, celebrations, disappointments, laughter, and plenty of learning along the way. Yet here we are.

Not because we've figured everything out, and certainly not because every season has been easy, but because we continue to choose one another.

I think sometimes we celebrate the number of years a couple has been married without talking enough about all the little choices contained within those years. A marriage isn't built only by saying I do once. It is strengthened by continuing to say, in countless different ways, I still choose you.

Sometimes that choice looks very practical. Put down the phone. Get away for the weekend. Sit beside each other. Listen. Laugh. Hold hands. Rest. Remember why you enjoy doing life together.

HOW DOES THE LORD PAMPER THE CHURCH THROUGH SABBATH?

One of the things I love about the Lord is that He doesn't only call His Bride to serve Him. He also calls her to come away with Him.

In Mark 6:31, Jesus told His disciples,

“Come with Me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

There is something so tender about that invitation. The Lord knows when we are tired. He knows how easily the demands of life can consume us. He doesn't shame us for needing rest or expect us to prove our devotion through constant activity. He invites us to step away from the noise and find rest in His presence.

That is one of the ways the Lord pampers His Bride through Sabbath. He gives us permission to stop producing long enough to simply enjoy being with Him. He reminds us that our relationship with Him isn't built only on what we do for Him. He wants our presence, our attention, and our hearts.

I believe marriage needs some of that same intentionality. Our spouse shouldn't continually receive whatever remains after everyone else has taken their portion of us. Sometimes love needs to say, “Come away with me. Let's make room for us.”

Still Choosing Us

This anniversary wasn't about trying to recreate where Bill and I were 16 years ago. We're not the same people we were then, and I don't want us to be. God has grown us, stretched us, humbled us, and carried us through a lot of life together. What I want is to continue enjoying the marriage we're building now.

I don't just want to look back someday and say that Bill and I stayed married. I want to know that along the way, we kept choosing our marriage. We made room for one another. We laughed together, prayed together, rested together, explored together, worked through the hard things, and occasionally stepped away from everything else long enough to remember just how much we still enjoy being together. Our peaceful weekend at the camper wasn't extravagant, but maybe that's part of what made it so special. We didn't need anything elaborate. We just needed time.

THIS WEEK'S PAMPER CHALLENGE

You don't need an anniversary or a weekend away to choose your marriage. Find some intentional, undistracted time for your spouse this week. It could be an evening on the porch, a drive, a walk, breakfast together, or simply turning off the television and putting away your phones.

Ask yourself: When was the last time we made room for just us?

Marriage will always have responsibilities attached to it, but your relationship deserves more than surviving the responsibilities together. Make room to enjoy the person God gave you.

Sixteen years later, I'm grateful for the life Bill and I have built, but I'm even more grateful that we're still choosing us.

S - Sabbath Together.

Sometimes the best gift you can give your marriage isn't another thing.

It's undistracted time together.

Remember: Your marriage does not need to be perfect, it just needs to be pampered.

If you'd like to go deeper into the seven biblical pillars that have strengthened our marriage, Pamper Your Marriage is available on our website. For a limited time, the book is only $15, and the companion workbook is $10. Whether you're married, dating, single, or investing in other relationships, these biblical principles can help you build stronger, healthier connections centered on Christ.

📖 Pamper Your Marriage is available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon, and our website🌐Learn more at www.PamperYourMarriage.org